


Welcome to Gravity Falls

by taztaas (ainonoai)



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Crossover, Cryptid Hunting, Gen, Protective Siblings, Summer Vacation, Supernatural Elements, alternative universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-16
Updated: 2017-12-16
Packaged: 2019-02-15 18:03:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13036497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ainonoai/pseuds/taztaas
Summary: It all began when Lup and Taako's parents decided that the twins could use some fresh air. They shipped them off to a sleepy town called Gravity Falls, Oregon, to stay at a family friend's house in the woods. Except "Uncle" Merle had turned his house into a tourist trap called The Mystery Shack. The real mystery was why anyone came. And guess who had to work there?





	Welcome to Gravity Falls

**Author's Note:**

> I blame @ultipoter on tumblr for encouraging me on this disastrous idea.  
> So yeah, this is a Gravity Falls/The Adventure Zone crossover/AU.  
> Based on this post of mine: https://taztaas.tumblr.com/post/168586376822/

The bus pulls to a stop and two young elves step out with their bags, observing their surroundings. The girl is wearing denim shorts and a plain white t-shirt. Her hair is up in a high ponytail and on her head is a blue and white cap with the NASA logo on it. On her feet she has worn, comfortable-looking sneakers and kneesocks with a flame-pattern around the top. Somehow she manages to look sporty, nerdy and super cool at the same time.

Her brother has his hair done in a braid and a pair of sunglasses sit on his head. He’s wearing a flashy pink sweater with a picture of a rainbow and an unicorn-like creature on it. He’s also wearing a short, purple skirt and gold-sequin chucks. Huge star-shaped earrings hang from his ears. He looks like somebody who got dressed in a charity shop in pitch darkness but he pulls it off expertly.

“Well,” says Taako, lowering his sunglasses back onto his face and popping a piece of gum in his mouth. “Welcome of bumfuck backcountry I guess.” He eyes the dirt road and surrounding woods with disdain as he chews on his gum, whereas Lup is looking around excitedly with a wide grin on her face. She takes a deep breath, savoring it.

“Smell that, Taako?” She asks, and Taako quickly pinches his nose shut.

“Lup, if you’re tryin’ to make me smell your fart again I swear to fucking-” Lup bursts out laughing, interrupting him. She slaps Taako on the arm.

“No you dingus! It’s nature!”

“If that’s what you wanna call it, sure,” Taako mutters, not letting go of his nose. Lup rolls her eyes at him and shoulders her backpack with determination.

“Come on, let’s get going.” She starts walking at a brisk pace, leaving Taako to follow. Taako grabs his own bag with a loud groan and trudges after her, complaining under his breath.

They arrive at the place where they’re going to spend all summer working, and it’s absolutely falling apart. It’s a tourist trap called The Mystery Shack, though the real mystery is why anyone would ever come here. The building is covered in gaudy signs advertising the place. One of the plaques actually falls off as the twins start to walk closer. Taako sighs, already world-weary.

Lup pushes open the door and they step into what looks like a souvenir shop. A young human guy wearing jeans and a mop of messy brown hair is lazily sweeping a broom across the floor. Taako grins, recognizing an easy target for teasing when he sees one.

“Hey, bluejeans!” Taako shouts to get the guys attention, and the guy sighs, not even bothering to hide it.

“Yeah, that’s real original, haven’t heard that one before.” He mutters under his breath, not really hiding that either. Taako lowers his sunglasses, narrowing his eyes at the guy. Lup laughs and elbows Taako in the side.

“I like this guy!”

“You would,” Taako hisses at her and puts his shades back on, even though they are inside. The guy sets the broom against the wall and approaches the twins, introducing himself.

“I’m Barry. I work here. Well, during the summer anyway.”

“I’m Lup, and this is my brother Taako,” Lup says, grinning widely, and grabs Barry’s hand to shake it. Taako doesn’t move a muscle but Barry doesn’t seem bothered. His eyes zoom in on Taako’s shirt and he smiles.

“Nice unicorn shirt.”

“It’s a _binicorn_ ,” Taako spits, seething, and crosses his arms defensively.

Lup asks Barry if he has any idea where the twins are supposed to be staying. Barry directs them to the stairs that take to the attic and goes back to his sweeping.

“Merle will be here soon, so uh, maybe don’t take too long.” He calls after them. Lup shoots him with finger guns in thanks, before turning around to follow Taako. He’s already halfway up the stairs, having spent more than enough time in the same room with _Barry fucking Bluejeans._

The attic is kinda dusty and cramped, but there are two beds, two nightstands, a desk and a closet. Taako flings his bag on one of the beds, before walking over and turning it upside down. An insane amount of clothing tumbles out of the small duffel bag, and he starts throwing them haphazardly in the general direction of the closet. Lup takes a quick step and goes to open the closet door so that at least some of Taako’s clothing _won’t_ end up on the floor. She sighs, fond of her brother's antics and takes a seat on the other bed.

Lup is smiling because she’s actually feeling pretty good about this summer. The city is nice, but it’s going to be amazing to spend the summer somewhere with a lot of space to explore. Lakes to swim at and all that good, good summer vacation stuff. Even though they’re supposed to be working most of the time she’s feeling pretty swell.

But that’s just how Lup is, always looking on the bright side of things, whereas Taako is the eternal pessimist. She really hopes that her brother will have a good time this summer too.

Lup looks at Taako, who has finished his disastrous unpacking and smiles. He raises a questioning eyebrow at her but she just shakes her head, it’s nothing. Taako scoffs at her and goes to set his sunglasses on the nightstand but he ends up staring through the window above it instead.

“Holy shit Lup.” He breathes, and Lup sits up straighter, intrigued.

“What? What is it?”

“Look!” Taako says, pointing at something outside. Lup stands, letting her backpack slide off in the process and goes over to him, peering at the window. A bus full of tourists has just parked on the yard, and people are already pouring out of the vehicle. Lup seems some decently handsome guys among them, none of them to her tastes though. But judging from the excited twitching of Taako’s ears, he has just found his reason to live through this summer. Lup grins at her brother and pats his shoulder placatingly.

“Taako, babe, I know you’re going through your boy-crazy phase, but maybe don’t go overboard with the crazy part this time, hmm?”

“Shut the hell up Lulu, this is Taako’s chance for an epic summer romance!” Taako’s face is a bit flushed and there is a dazzling grin on his face as he turns to face Lup. She grins back, shaking his shoulder slightly.

“Yeah, for sure, just don’t flirt with every boy you meet, yeah?” She says, raising her free hand and offering her fist for a fistbump. “No promises,” Taako says with a diabolical smile and hits her fist with his own.

They go back downstairs and are just in time to hear someone (who must be Merle), introduce some bullshit attraction to the tourists in the other room. “Here we have rock-that-looks-like-a-face rock, the rock that looks like a face...”

Lup catches Barry’s eye as he’s dusting the shelves, and he shakes his head at Lup, having heard Merle’s tirades probably a thousand times already. Lup smiles and winks at him. Barry’s face goes red and he suddenly finds the dusting extremely interesting.

On the other side of the room, a friend-shaped, muscular human in a green flannel shirt (and a top that says ‘I think dogs should vote’) is manning the cash register. Or to be more precise, he’s sitting at the register but reading a carpentry magazine. He introduces himself as Magnus, and Taako compliments his sideburns with an exaggerated bat of his eyelashes. Lup groans in exasperation as Magnus answers with an excited “Thanks! I grew them myself!”

Everyone in the room jumps as Merle slams the door open. He’s a dwarf with a gray beard and a messy bun on top of his head. He’s wearing a Hawaiian t-shirt, cargo shorts and sandals with socks. Taako audibly gags as he sees him, Lup just giggles.

Apparently, the impromptu tourist group had made Merle lose his patience, and he had chased them away without showing them to the souvenir shop. Merle is pulling on his frazzled beard in annoyance when he spots the twins.

“Oh, it’s you two. Got yourselves situated already?”

“Yeah, no thanks to you.” Taako replies at the same time as Lup says “Barry showed us to the attic.”

“Welcome, or whatever. I’d ask how your parents are doing but it’s not like I actually care.” Merle says, waving a dismissive hand. He walks into some kind of back room, emerging after a moment with an armful of wooden signs, a hammer, and a bunch of nails. It’s quite impressive, seeing how he is pretty small in stature.

“Alright! Look alive people, I need somebody to go hammer up these signs in the spooky part of the forest.”

“Not it!” Lup and Taako chorus on instinct, and Barry follows with “Also not it!”

Merle glares poison daggers at them all in turn before turning to the fourth teen in the room.

“Magnus! I need you to put up these signs.”

“Uhh.. okay.” Magnus says, setting his magazine down. He walks over to grab the signs. He’s a lot bigger than Merle so he doesn’t struggle a bit with the load.

“But I’m not going alone in there!” He continues with a slightly panicked look. Merle just rolls his eyes.

“The whole monsters in the forest thing is just a local legend! There’s _nothing_ out there!” Merle assures, though Magnus still looks unconvinced. Lup takes pity on him and volunteers to go with, grabbing the tools. Magnus shoots her a thankful grin and they step out, Lup waving goodbye to Taako who looks more than happy to skip the work and hang back. “Taako’s good out here!” He chirps at them as the door closes.

* * *

 Magnus leads the way to the so called ‘spooky’ part of the woods, and they start attaching the signs - advertisements for The Mystery Shack. Magnus is very proficient with a hammer, so they switch so that Lup is holding the plaques instead.

They get a good amount of signs attached, before one of the trees lets out a metallic sound as Magnus tries to hammer a nail into it. They both blink in surprise, and Lup drops the bundle in her hands to step closer to inspect the tree. She tries knocking on it with her fist and a metal compartment pops open. Lup freezes and turns to look at Magnus with a raised brow, questioning wordlessly. Magnus looks just as puzzled as she feels, and he shrugs. Lup turns back to the little compartment.

There's some sort of machinery inside, with a few switches and buttons. Lup quickly flips a switch before Magnus gets a chance to tell her not to. There’s another sound behind them, and they turn around to see a square-shaped hole in the ground.

“Holy shit!” Lup and Magnus say in unison, and they turn to grin and high-five each other before they rush over to investigate. There is another metal compartment in the ground. At the bottom of it lies something that looks like an old book. It’s covered in spiderwebs which prompts a loud “Ewww!” from Magnus but Lup grabs the book without hesitation. She holds it in front of her and blows on the book to get rid of the dust. There is a large, golden hand with the number three on it on the cover.

Lup opens the book, Magnus hovering over her shoulder, and its revealed to be a journal. It’s some sort of record of paranormal investigations performed in Gravity Falls by an unknown author. The text claims that the town has a secret dark side, and after a certain point the pages just stop, like the person writing the journal mysteriously disappeared.

A heavy weight settles in Lup’s gut when she reads a page that proclaims that there is no one you can trust in Gravity Falls and nothing is as it seems.

“Whatcha readin’? Some nerd thing?”

“AAAHHH!” Lup and Magnus scream in unison, startled by Taako’s sudden appearance behind them. Lup whips around, clutching the journal to her chest. Magnus is looking pale, and he’s pressing his hand to his heart as he gingerly sits down on a tree log.

Taako is absolutely cracking up, bent over and wiping tears of mirth from his eyes as he laughs his ass off at Lup and Magnus’ reactions.

“Oh my god, oh my-” He gasps, “Oh man, holy shit that was priceless!”

“You’re a dick Taako.” Lup says and glares at him, feeling a bit shaken despite herself. “What are you doing here anyway?” She asks after Taako has managed to calm himself down.

“Ya’ll took too long so I came over to see what the deal was.” Taako shrugs noncommittally, before his ears twitch and he slaps his hands together in excitement.

“Also! News from Taako central! Taako has a date!” He singsongs and does a little twirl. Magnus, finally recovered from his ordeal, congratulates him warmly. Lup narrows her eyes.

“You got a boyfriend in the half an hour me and Magnus were out here in the woods?”

“Dunno what to tell ya homie,” Taako preens, flipping his hair, “I guess cha’boy is just that irresistible.”

Lup rolls her eyes and tucks the book under her arm as the three of them start to trek back to the shack, tools and supplies forgotten.

* * *

 Taako and Lup are sitting in the living room, watching a cooking show on the TV when the doorbell rings. Merle, sitting in an armchair knitting something misshaped and yellow, lifts a brow at Taako when he bolts up from the sofa like a spring and runs to the door. They hear Taako invite someone in, and he returns after a moment dragging a handsome, dark-skinned half-elf by the hand. He’s dressed like a hardcore goth and he looks hella nervous.

“Say hello to my new boyfriend Kravitz!” Taako squeals, and drapes himself on Kravitz’s arm, looking up to him with hearts in his eyes.

“Umm, hello…” Kravitz says carefully.

Lup nods, “‘sup.”

“How’s it hangin’.” Says Merle, not looking up from his… craft.

“We met at the cemetery, Kravitz is like, really deep.” Taako gushes, and his new boyfriend smiles down at him warmly, if a little unsurely. Lup looks at the two of them, deciding to be welcoming. She offers some garlic bread to Kravitz (she and Taako baked it earlier) but he vehemently declines. Lup glares at him, suspicious. Who doesn’t like garlic bread? Well, maybe it’s indeed a bad snack choice before a date.

“Don’t wait up!” Taako yells and they are gone almost in a blink of an eye.

* * *

 It’s late evening, and Lup is lounging around in the living room, leafing through the journal. There are several entries about different kind of supernatural creatures. She ends up reading an entry about vampires and the unsettling weight from before is back in her gut. The journal lists the usual spiel about vampires: unable to enter homes without being invited, can’t stand garlic, not seen during the day, red glowing eyes, can’t cross running waters. Lup frowns. The date had been after sunset, and if Kravitz’s eyes hadn’t exactly glowed, they had seemed kinda red in color, now that Lup was thinking back on it. And she had heard Taako invite the guy in. And! He didn’t like garlic! Also, vampires have fangs. Lup hadn’t seen those but Kravitz had been very careful to not show his teeth when smiling...

“Is my brother really dating a vampire or am I going nuts.”

“A dilemma to be sure.”

Lup screams, surprised and turns to see Barry changing a lightbulb in the corner. He looks sheepish.

“Sorry, I couldn't help but overhear you talking aloud to yourself.”

“Barry! You’ve seen Taako’s boyfriend, he’s gotta be a vampire!”

“Look Lup, uh, I believe you.” Barry says, scratching his cheek, awkward. “I keep noticing weird stuff in this town, I’m pretty sure the mailman is a werewolf. But you gotta have proof.”

“As usual Barry, you are right.” Lup muses with a stern nod, hand at her chin.

“My wisdom is both a blessing, and a curse.” Barry says seriously, and Lup feels a flash of affection for the guy. What a dork.

Taako could be in trouble, time to get some evidence!

* * *

 The following few days, Lup is stalking Taako and his boyfriend. Well, she wouldn’t call it stalking, it’s more like espionage. She takes note of the way Kravitz never enters any place before Taako, and how he cringes every time Taako eats something with garlic. (Taako frigging loves garlic, he made a chicken dish with thirty cloves once!)

Kravitz also refuses to cross the nearby river. And, all their dates take place after sunset. Lup decides it’s definitely time for an intervention. She corners Taako in their room one night, after another one of Taako’s dates. Lup is sitting on her bed, stern look on her face, arms and legs crossed in a stiff posture.

“Taako! We gotta talk about Kravitz.” She says immediately as Taako steps into the room.

“Ain’t he the best?” Taako sighs happily, going to the mirror to take of his jewelry. “Not too crazy about the cold clamminess of his skin but-” Lup’s eyes widen, now more sure than ever.

“Taako, Kravitz isn’t what he seems!” Taako just snorts and Lup’s irritation skyrockets. “He’s a vampire!” Taako meets her eyes via the mirror and he is still and silent for a moment before he bursts out laughing. Lup bristles, a flush spreading on her face.

“I have proof! He never smiles to show his teeth, he’s hiding fangs!”

“He’s got braces! He’s self conscious about them!”

“He doesn’t like garlic!”

“He’s allergic!”

“He won’t cross running water!”

“He almost drowned as a kid, he’s afraid of water!”

“His eyes are red and… and he never enters a building without you! And you never see him in sunlight!”

“Reddish BROWN Lup, and he’s a gentleman, that’s why!” Taako shouts, slamming his hand on the table in front of him, angered. “And we can only meet late because he’s got a summer job, just like us, you know?”

Lup feels her resolve crumble, but she makes one last futile attempt.

“You just said his skin is cold…” She mutters, though she knows it’s no use, she has spectacularly lost this argument.

“He has bad circulation!” Taako screeches, face red and fists clenched. “I can’t believe you Lup, I thought you’d be happy for me!”

“You can’t trust anyone here Taako, the journal said-” Lup pleads, desperation in her tone.

“How about you trust me, Lup, me? Your fucking _brother?!_ ” Taako looks upset, one hand pressed to his chest and one extended to the side and Lup hasn’t felt this guilty in a long time.

“I’ve got a date tomorrow.” Taako breaks eye contact and starts pulling off his clothes. He leaves his underwear and shirt on as he pulls at the covers of his bed and settles into it.

“I’m gonna be adorable and he’s gonna be dreamy, and you’re not gonna ruin it with some crazy conspiracy theory.” He says with conviction and turns off the light, leaving Lup in the darkness. Lup feels more alone than ever when she looks her brother turn around in his bed, presenting his back to her. Blocking her out. She bites her lip, changes into her nightclothes and tries to keep from crying as she pulls the covers over herself.

* * *

 When Lup wakes up the next morning Taako is already gone downstairs for breakfast. He doesn’t talk to her, or meet her eyes for the whole day and it breaks Lup’s heart. She has a small breakdown in the cleaning closet around lunch. Barry finds her and comforts her with an awkward hug. It’s good, but not good enough to make her feel better.

The day goes by agonizingly slowly. When it’s time for Taako’s date, Lup sits on the porch and watches her brother leave, dressed to the nines, nose stuck up in the air. He’s still ignoring her and it makes her feel hollow inside. She found one of Magnus’ magazines, and she’s trying hard to concentrate on it when she hears a loud scream come from the forest. It’s Taako.

She jumps to her feet and runs to Magnus, who just parked the golf cart they use to move between the town and the Shack.

“Magnus! Dude, you gotta lend me the golf cart, I gotta save my brother from a vampire!”

“No way, do you even know how to drive? Lemme give you a ride, I have vehicle proficiency.” Magnus says with a grin and a thumbs up. Lup smiles back at him and hops onto the cart. Magnus is definitely speeding, and narrowly avoid hitting a few pedestrians as they rush towards where Lup heard the scream coming form. When the cemetery comes to view, Lup already knows that that’s where the date is. She jumps from the moving cart. Magnus shouts in shock and hits the brakes, but Lup is already running and vaulting over the low stone wall of the cemetery.

“Taako!” She screams, and spots Taako and Kravitz standing near the center of the area. She storms towards them, and hears Taako call her name questioningly, and she’d be so happy to hear that if she wasn’t mad as fuck and pulling her fist back to punch a vampire in the fucking face. She sees Kravitz’s eyes widen and his jaw drop. Lup notices a distinct lack of fangs and the very obvious presence of metal in his mouth but she’s already committed to the punch and it’s too late to stop her movement. Or so she thinks.

Someone tackles her to the ground and the flash of flannel in the corner of her eye tells her it’s Magnus. She has a second to wonder how he got here so fast before she hits the ground and the wind is knocked out of her.

When she comes to, she feels familiar ring covered hands on her cheeks, and she opens her eyes to see Taako’s worried face above her. She grabs at his hands, covering them with her own.

“Taako…”

“Lulu! What the fuck did you think you were doing! Magnus almost cracked your goddamn head open!” Taako says in a worried rush, ignoring Magnus’ sound of indignance at the accusation.

“Taako!” She almost sobs, so relieved to have him near again, to look into his eyes and hear his voice. Feeling exhausted and vulnerable, tears start welling up in her eyes and Taako’s eyes widen at the sight. He says nothing, he just drops down on top of her and pulls her into an embrace. She hides her face in his hair as silent tears fall down on her face. Laying on the grass, Lup clutches at Taako’s back and feels him tighten the hug in response.

“Goofus,” She hears him whisper into her hair, “Why were you trying to punch my boyfriend? I told you he has braces, you would’ve hurt your beautiful fist.”

She laughs lightly and nuzzles at his neck. “I was trying to save you from the vampire.”

“Idiot.” Taako says fondly and pulls back to look at her. His hair is loose and it falls in a curtain around them, shielding them from Magnus and Kravitz. “I’m sorry for making you worry. Cha’boy always gets into relationships quick, but Krav is a good guy. You’ll like him.”

Lup sniffs wetly. “I’m sorry too. I should’ve trusted you.” Taako lifts a hand and roughly wipes the tears off her face. “We good?”

“We good. I love you Taako. You’re my heart.”

“I love you too Lup.”

The journal said not to trust anyone, but if you can't have faith in you own twin, then who can you trust?

* * *

"Hey, Taako."

"Yeah?"

"Why'd you scream anyway?"

"Oh, some fucking bird swooped down and stole my sandwich! Can you believe?"

"...Are you for real?"

"Hey! It was a really good sandwich!"

* * *

 Merle had told them that there’s nothing strange about the town, but someone had written that journal, and both Barry and Magnus seem to agree that there is something fishy going on in Gravity Falls. Who knows what other secrets are waiting to be unlocked? In Lup’s opinion, this summer was shaping up to be the best summer ever.


End file.
